A most miraculous toilet seat

We recently had to replace the toilet seat. I bought one on amazon and as with most manufactured product it was flown directly from the orient. As with these things they come with a plethora of instructions. I do not expect the instruction sheet for a toilet to be overly arduous. However, there were a few oddities that I struggled to entirely get to grips with.



Clearly it is important to have a neat toilet seat. My main worry here is over the taste of the surface. I am not one to encourage the licking of toilet seats to ascertain the flavour of the seat. My children have so far refused this experiment. 


One of the reasons the children have refused to lick the toilet seat is clearly demonstrated in a further section about safety. Children should not be allowed to play with the toilet seat. This can result in hurting fingers, and 'other' accident. I do not know what the other accident might be but if you look close enough to the tiny child who is not to scale does utter the words 'Wow!' Let us hope there are no life altering accidents where this toilet seat is concerned.


Once the seat has been attached and no children have died in the process you can then begin to use the seat for its purpose. The process of attaching the seat; once completed, requires you to then treat it with the respect the instructions ask you too. In this case, tenderly!



My particular favourite though I have kept for last and this is very important advice. I can assure you that we do follow this procedure. I can confirm that daily we do remove the smut from the seat. I hope you do too.
















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